I could remember it like it was yesterday.
I had woken up by the inviting smell of bacon. Mama had never failed in rumbling my tummy every morning. She was glad that like every other mother, she didnt have to force me to get up by pushing me till I fell out of bed. I woke up everyday just to see her beautiful face and take full delight in gorging her food.
I loved Mama because she loved me
She was an artists highest selling piece of work, simple,serene and strong. Never did I see her show any signs of weakness and she would always face me with a smile. I couldnt have wished for a better mother.
There I was relishing my breakfast with complete enthusiasm, it had been a cold day. The mail man hadnt come that day as well. So much for the term "Neither hail, nor snow, nor whatever the rest was". Mina my younger sister had just come after her bath. The two of us would walk 6 miles everyday to school. My house was at the top of a hill and it was quite some distance from the main city. Papa, whose work started early in the day had left early today as well. Papa was a good man, he would always buy us toys and take us to the city on every weekend either to the fair or to the theatre. Mama and Papa loved the plays over there. Mina and I would always find something else to do at that time.
Kissing her goodbye, Mina and I began our walk to school. I can still remember the chill in my fingers, it had been a very cold day indeed. Mama had given me the sweater just in case.
Mama always cared...
As evening, drew, Mina and I had decided to have a race back home, partly because I just loved beating her and partly because I couldnt wait to get back home. My tummy was rumbling again.
Puffing,panting and laughing as I entered the house, I called out "Mama !" but there was no reply. I called to her again but I was answered only in silence. Mina had entered by now and she too kept on callin her name repeatedly. As odd as it may have felt, I knew that Mama was O.K. she had probably had some urgent work and had to leave. We settled ourselves and found something to eat. I was partly angry at Mama for leaving us like that without any food at all. Mina and I waited till 11 pm sitting at the family couch after which the two of us dozed off...
I remember dreaming of Mama, walking through the door of our house, picking us up and tucking us safely in the warmth of our beds. Not knowing that the next morning I would be greeted not by Mama but some men in suits
It was a beautiful dream.
Monday, August 6, 2007
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Just my Luck
Good day all
Heres something that i have never done when it comes to writing down stuff. Boast.
To be frank I have always been a proud one and self obsessed like every virgo, not giving a damn about what I say or do or what effects it makes on others.
Now since I dont like showing these traits to people, I choose not to further disclose the skeletons in my closet.
Anyway, the reason why i have chosen to mention all this nonsense is for the pure fact to tell you all that I am the luckiest person on Earth. I really dont even feel right while writing this, because I have no idea what you all will make of this. But as an advise. Dont think about it.
Its something that i just wish to write and for the sake of keeping my blog alive, i wrote it here. Its nothing to appreciate or nothing to criticize its something that I have chosen to engrave on the stones of time.
So later, when maybe the days wont be as glorious as they are now, Ill look back at this and say to myself " Life wasnt always a bitch". Because for now, even though there is the case of influenza and the weird case of pain only in the right leg, i couldnt wish for anything else (A good hair texture would help although). I just feel happy for everything and anything around me and dont hope for anything else, for time will not listen to hopes and fears, it will tell...
Only time will tell...
Heres something that i have never done when it comes to writing down stuff. Boast.
To be frank I have always been a proud one and self obsessed like every virgo, not giving a damn about what I say or do or what effects it makes on others.
Now since I dont like showing these traits to people, I choose not to further disclose the skeletons in my closet.
Anyway, the reason why i have chosen to mention all this nonsense is for the pure fact to tell you all that I am the luckiest person on Earth. I really dont even feel right while writing this, because I have no idea what you all will make of this. But as an advise. Dont think about it.
Its something that i just wish to write and for the sake of keeping my blog alive, i wrote it here. Its nothing to appreciate or nothing to criticize its something that I have chosen to engrave on the stones of time.
So later, when maybe the days wont be as glorious as they are now, Ill look back at this and say to myself " Life wasnt always a bitch". Because for now, even though there is the case of influenza and the weird case of pain only in the right leg, i couldnt wish for anything else (A good hair texture would help although). I just feel happy for everything and anything around me and dont hope for anything else, for time will not listen to hopes and fears, it will tell...
Only time will tell...
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Wish I was here
Let me introduce you all to my family, I on the other hand, am the empty seat to the far right
All Apologies
The world has become a much smaller place now. With nothing much to do except drag the corpse from room to class and class to room. With catching the bus at the odd weekend and heading back to my refuge, my haven, my love. Aah love, it is but a very weird and yet fascinating thing. To believe in it is something that I found much harder than believeing in ghosts. It is there around us and yet we fail to see it, feel it and give it.
Rohit Bhat, a Koshur comrade had once told me, one can't write when he is in love and I dont know whether I have believed it or I have taken it as an excuse but either ways, love has been the cause for my turbulent pause. The violin shall play one day, maybe on my wedding or on my boy's first recital or on my funeral... it shall play.
The pen does not wish to write, it wishes to splatter its ink and paint the town red. I leave you at peace today and come back when this heart will be content or shall be broken but for now I am incomplete and so is my blog.
Goodnight and Godspeed
Rohit Bhat, a Koshur comrade had once told me, one can't write when he is in love and I dont know whether I have believed it or I have taken it as an excuse but either ways, love has been the cause for my turbulent pause. The violin shall play one day, maybe on my wedding or on my boy's first recital or on my funeral... it shall play.
The pen does not wish to write, it wishes to splatter its ink and paint the town red. I leave you at peace today and come back when this heart will be content or shall be broken but for now I am incomplete and so is my blog.
Goodnight and Godspeed
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Things
Things That I find Gay
1. People naming their non-living posessions ! (Sorry Roda ) lll
2. All Hindi Movies
3. The Colour PINK
4. Country Music !
5. Men wearing Bracelets
Best Things in life
1. People naming their non-living posessions ! (Sorry Roda ) lll
2. All Hindi Movies
3. The Colour PINK
4. Country Music !
5. Men wearing Bracelets
Best Things in life
1. Bubbles - My ipod
2. Sholay !
3. Rainbows
4. The Beatles !
5. Girls when they swear.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
The Violinist
The skies had been dark for more than a month, one had even forgotten what the sun looked or felt like. Its soothing and warm rays falling on the bare skin, giving it an eternal glow and its strong rays leading us from the cold and void darkness to light. The birds had stopped singing, the cool breeze had also stopped. Replacing these were the cries of innocents, begging for mercy and the explosions carrying their echoes throughout the land.
War was on.
It started as a misunderstanding of two arrogant minds but who ever really cared about the thoughts of two when there was blood of millions to spill. Books had been written, Songs had been sung, movies had been made, Oscars had been won. Today as I sit in this train on a journey which could possibly be my last, I drift away from the gruesome noise of the engine and back to the times when things were much peaceful.
Peaceful… Peaceful ?
I had never felt a pause for so long, the blank feeling was for a moment but it showed a pause that had been existing for centuries. Times never had been peaceful, there was always tension, always a feud, always a conspiracy. There was always a war on. Bursting my bubbles of thought, I looked at my broken watch clumsily and wondered what the time was. As I peered out through the grills of my bogey and craned my neck up to the sky, I estimated that it was time for my daily prayer. In the hours so close to death, we still don’t try to accept our fate, we always look for a savior to come and take us away from this madness.
With a silent Amen, I ended my prayer and let the silence empower me. Bound in these shackles, I wondered where this train was taking me to. I remember my neighbor,Milosh telling me once of these ‘camps’ where many were taken bound and gagged and made to work there like slaves. It is sad that he had to be shot at that very instant, I could have received more information on these ‘camps’.
I am not a father, a husband or a brother. I am a violinist. ‘Emily’ I call her and she is my only family. The two of us met in an old antique shop on Rue de Balzac where I had fallen in love the moment I set my sights on her. When I touched her with my bare hands and fiddled her with my stick, magic was at its best. The shopkeeper himself was amazed how well I handled her. It had been 15 years since that meeting and today I had been separated from her forever.
Lost in her thoughts I was so deep that I did not realise the train slowing down to a halt. As the door of the bogie opened, a German in uniform climbed in. As soon as he looked at me, he shouted out something in German and the next thing I know, I was facing the hollow end of the barrel of a rifle.
(to be continued...)
War was on.
It started as a misunderstanding of two arrogant minds but who ever really cared about the thoughts of two when there was blood of millions to spill. Books had been written, Songs had been sung, movies had been made, Oscars had been won. Today as I sit in this train on a journey which could possibly be my last, I drift away from the gruesome noise of the engine and back to the times when things were much peaceful.
Peaceful… Peaceful ?
I had never felt a pause for so long, the blank feeling was for a moment but it showed a pause that had been existing for centuries. Times never had been peaceful, there was always tension, always a feud, always a conspiracy. There was always a war on. Bursting my bubbles of thought, I looked at my broken watch clumsily and wondered what the time was. As I peered out through the grills of my bogey and craned my neck up to the sky, I estimated that it was time for my daily prayer. In the hours so close to death, we still don’t try to accept our fate, we always look for a savior to come and take us away from this madness.
With a silent Amen, I ended my prayer and let the silence empower me. Bound in these shackles, I wondered where this train was taking me to. I remember my neighbor,Milosh telling me once of these ‘camps’ where many were taken bound and gagged and made to work there like slaves. It is sad that he had to be shot at that very instant, I could have received more information on these ‘camps’.
I am not a father, a husband or a brother. I am a violinist. ‘Emily’ I call her and she is my only family. The two of us met in an old antique shop on Rue de Balzac where I had fallen in love the moment I set my sights on her. When I touched her with my bare hands and fiddled her with my stick, magic was at its best. The shopkeeper himself was amazed how well I handled her. It had been 15 years since that meeting and today I had been separated from her forever.
Lost in her thoughts I was so deep that I did not realise the train slowing down to a halt. As the door of the bogie opened, a German in uniform climbed in. As soon as he looked at me, he shouted out something in German and the next thing I know, I was facing the hollow end of the barrel of a rifle.
(to be continued...)
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
She, U and I
The sun was shining, the birds were singing and so was my heart. Paris was all around me and I was all around her. She stood by me with her hair open and was admiring the view from the top of the Eiffel tower as she exclaimed, “Isn’t that beautiful ?” And as I gazed into those beautiful, endless eyes of hers, I said “You’re the one who makes it so beautiful. You’re the cherry on the top, without which the ice-cream would be nothing.” On hearing this, her cheeks turn red as she blushes and falls into my arms as I embrace her with all my love, wanting to hold her forever.
Forever,forever,forever...
Suddenly I was brought back to reality as my auto hits one of the infamous potholes of Delhi. I checked my watch and saw that I just had 5 minutes before the movie started, I implored the driver to risk his life for me and speed up a little. As he screeched in front of the complex, I took out my wallet in a hurry and handed him the money. I ran with the strength in my legs to the movie theatre with the police looking at me with suspicious eyes. On reaching, I found no one was there. Nobody to greet me or shout at me for being late. As I looked around for someone familiar, I recalled last night’s conversation and I was quite sure that I had heard, “ Meet me outside the movie theater at sharp 11”. As I checked the watch again, I saw that it was 5 minutes past 11 and still no company. “Well, there go the trailers” I said to myself, so I decided to do the obvious, wait.
As I looked at the crowd, I noticed the bubbly school children in their flocks, the cute couples whispering to each other and giggling, the cranky kids shedding their crocodiles’ tears wailing to buy a new toy (those were the days) and then there was the youth of today which the whole world was talking about and I was supposed to be one of them. I had looked at crowds like these everyday, scanning for a face, a face I would be elated to see, a face that stood out amongst all, a face that I could never figure out. And today was one of those rare days when I will be seeing that face once again. I think, because now it had been 15 minutes past 11 and there was still no sign of her.
Suddenly something caught hold of my attention. No, it wasn’t what I was expecting, but instead, it was a brawl that was taking place between some school kids, with fists flying and shirts tearing. I guess my movie had already started! But as soon as the fight started, it got over too and I was left staring at the crowd once again. I had begun to have my doubts when suddenly the wind blew, the crowd parted and there she was. There was the face that I had hoped I could run into everyday.
And finally after the long wait (it was totally worth it), she was here.
Forever,forever,forever...
Suddenly I was brought back to reality as my auto hits one of the infamous potholes of Delhi. I checked my watch and saw that I just had 5 minutes before the movie started, I implored the driver to risk his life for me and speed up a little. As he screeched in front of the complex, I took out my wallet in a hurry and handed him the money. I ran with the strength in my legs to the movie theatre with the police looking at me with suspicious eyes. On reaching, I found no one was there. Nobody to greet me or shout at me for being late. As I looked around for someone familiar, I recalled last night’s conversation and I was quite sure that I had heard, “ Meet me outside the movie theater at sharp 11”. As I checked the watch again, I saw that it was 5 minutes past 11 and still no company. “Well, there go the trailers” I said to myself, so I decided to do the obvious, wait.
As I looked at the crowd, I noticed the bubbly school children in their flocks, the cute couples whispering to each other and giggling, the cranky kids shedding their crocodiles’ tears wailing to buy a new toy (those were the days) and then there was the youth of today which the whole world was talking about and I was supposed to be one of them. I had looked at crowds like these everyday, scanning for a face, a face I would be elated to see, a face that stood out amongst all, a face that I could never figure out. And today was one of those rare days when I will be seeing that face once again. I think, because now it had been 15 minutes past 11 and there was still no sign of her.
Suddenly something caught hold of my attention. No, it wasn’t what I was expecting, but instead, it was a brawl that was taking place between some school kids, with fists flying and shirts tearing. I guess my movie had already started! But as soon as the fight started, it got over too and I was left staring at the crowd once again. I had begun to have my doubts when suddenly the wind blew, the crowd parted and there she was. There was the face that I had hoped I could run into everyday.
And finally after the long wait (it was totally worth it), she was here.
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