Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Untouched by humanity for decades, the temple could have been blown away by the violent of storms but it never ceased to move an inch. Small in size, it was never seen during the day by the common folk and those who knew of it, chose not to speak of it. It was considered a Taboo by all and none dared to come within a mile of the horrific structure. But this was the night when footsteps were to be heard by the walls of this edifice. Probably for the first time, probably not. The footsteps grew louder as they approached towards the door, slow they were, but not weak. A score of silence, broken by the banging of the doors as a silhouette of a being stood at the entrance of the temple. The moonlight fell as it outlined a person, probably a man with long hair, slouching as he carried a bundle over his back.
Frantically, the bundle seemed to be moving.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Sitting in his room that was clouded by the rings of smoke. His eyes red with exhaustion and that speaker in his ears. The others weren't any help as well. Eddie Vedder was ledbettering. A day of fears had just passed, his head was not here, neither was it there. He got that cigarette, the last bit of it. Pressing it between his fingers as he finally got that heat from the burning tip to his lips. The smoke stung his throat but he got his last puff. A bucket of ash and chicken bones waited in solitude at a corner. Aimed to the edge, the butt bounces and dances and finally falls to the oblivion. Whiskey was waiting for him too,he chose to stay sane.
His friends were leaving one after one, a girl has been dumped, a bird has just died. She hasn't been seen ever since. She flew south one day for the winters and never chose to come back.
The cigarettes can't seem to end. His worries somehow do.
He aimed at the skies
He never really got high.
He was blue and yellow
He chose to stay mellow
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Yes you, I aint talking to the cute girl sitting next to you or the person whose been staring at you for the past 5 minutes. Sometimes people do want to talk to you too. Its just that they wait for you to make that first move. Dont worry, I aint giving a philosophical lecture here. Im just talking to you. Word has it that you've been worried about a lot over the past few days. I aint blaming you for the state you're in. The Times are like these. Right ?
See you arent the father of a bride, neither did your company just go bankrupt.
Yeah, if you do have exams and commitment issues, then I can cut you some slack.
And tell you to tie yourself in a sack and ship yourself to wherever you may be happier.
Worries really never did get you anywhere. They just took you from A, placed you at Z and then made run all the way back to B. But then again, who am I to say all this ? Am I God ? Or am I a plain human ?
The fact of the matter is, I'm you. You and you and you and definitely you.
Problems rise at times but sadly, worries rise much sooner and much in number.
Its not your fault, you are just like that aren't you ?
If you fear that the next moment somebody is going to bang at your door and beat the pulp out of you, if you fear that things will get worse in the future and if you fear that you aren't gonna do what you're supposed to do... Heres an advice,
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
I have a lot of time in a day, half of which I spend worrying about how much I have spent and the rest I spend worrying about how much I have left.
Rooms are left dirty and dumped. Phones are left broken, bellies are left hanging. Debates are left dangling and friends are pushed aside. Hearts are left broken, grades are left filling. Tunes are left begging and blogs are yet to be written.
Lives are yet to be made and Failure is left to be saved.
Someone said, If i were organized, I'd be dangerous.
I say, If i were I were organized, I'd be in a fairy tale.
Here's to hoping that I wake up one of these mornings and take that initiative to put my life back on track. Maybe a little according to TIME
Sunday, September 14, 2008
I hadn’t even moved a metre when came the sound of distant thunder as I instinctively tilted my head to the heavens. Following suit, came the element of water splattering over my temple as though I had been blessed by the rain gods. As the drop trickled down over my face, I looked behind at my passengers and they too could feel it. They could feel the coming of chaos, the chaos that made everything stand still. The wind picked up and so did the falling of drops. A common man’s instinctive mood would be to look for cover but somehow, I wasn’t in the mood for it. As if they had read my thoughts, one of the two behind me asked me “Do you mind driving us in the rain?” I just looked back at them with a smile and nodded. Nothing could stop me now from becoming one with the rain. I took out my packet of guthka and handed it to them for safekeeping. They kept it with a bemused look and pulled over the canopy above their heads as the rain pelted down on the three of us. Moving my rickshaw with the strength in my legs, I could hardly make out of what lay in front of me, I just chose to keep myself moving in one direction. I passed by my fellow rickshaw pullers under the shade of trees, buildings, bus stops who looked at me and laughed at my insanity but I chose to care less. I was having the time of my life and my worries and sorrows had been swept away by the rain. Soon the water started dripping on my friends too but they didn’t seem to be bothered, they too were enjoying this frenzy of nature as we took a stroll through the forests of rain.
I looked up at the towering street lights as they illuminated the drops of rain that had now reduced in number. I wondered how we all were also like drops of rain, some being smaller, some being bigger, some faster, some slower but at the end of it all, they are brought down to the same level once they hit the earth. Lost in my thoughts, I didn’t even realize when the rain had stopped and when I had reached the destination. I slowly pressed the brakes and my rickshaw came to a halt. My passengers got down, wet and wild but not as drenched as I was. I was handed the dry and crispy notes for my services, notes that were my income, my food, my water and not to forget my guthka which too was handed to me, dry and warm as ever. As I was about to push my feet back on the pedal and head back, I saw a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and it was the bulky of the two passengers who was staring at me as he said “Thanks for the ride”. I confess, I was taken aback by this untimely gesture but it moved something in me as well. My friends had gone on to their homes and as I pushed my rickshaw on the wet dark streets of the city, I remembered my Late Grandfather here. He used to quote “People with worlds of differences can feel as one under the hand of God” and today I felt the warm hand of God on my wet shoulder.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Then my eyes shifted to a corner of the front page and I looked at something that made my tummy take a somersault. It was the date. 14th September 2008. A day before my birthday. In other words, the last day of my teens. I felt weird and as I sat there blankly staring at my newspaper, I ran through the pages of my life. Starting from my 13th birthday to all the things I had done the following years, the ups, the downs, the tears, the sweat, the girls, the papers, the new looks, the lies, the friends, the fights. It all seemed to pass by so quickly. And today was the last day of that life and maybe something was still left for me to do before I let go of this part of my life. So I stood up in an instant as the sun shone on my eyes and I as if posing a challenge, stared back at it huffing and puffing. I looked at my bed and wondered, "How many hours and days I had wasted of my teens just sleeping ?" I tilted my head low in shame. But I tilted it up again with pride and with an agility that I had never had before, jumped back into the bed as I answered " Maybe Not Enough"...
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
People have started writing and for somehow reasons which are well above my understanding. I have this blog to maintain known as the DREAM COMPASS but I fail to see anyone making an effort to bring forth their ideas. I only see revolts springing and mud slinging. Peace has always been something volatile that can't be just kept constant. There has to be some itch in the back after every scratch. And so, I'm done with my couches and my potatoes. I can't wait for Minerva to shower her blessings on me and make me a genius. I will just have to keep on with whatever I have. I am tired and in need for a long vacation, away from this chaos and hustle and bustle. But since there is no way out of here, I can just wait to see how the cookie crumbles. I feel helpless at times and at others I feel hopeless. There is fire in many of us and it is time to bring forth our own...
Saturday, August 2, 2008
A bright and sunny day it was and I was back to being 3 years old. Note more than a foot high, cradled in my mother's arms and sucking my thumb I was living the good life.As I looked onto her face, I knew that this day wasn't like any other. There was some sort of excitement on her face, a mixture of feelings seemed to be empowering her face as she carefully changed my diaper. It was as if she was uncertain, unsure and then I saw it happening. As slow as it could get, came a deep, long sigh from the depths of her lungs.
She was nervous
As she carried me out into the open through the the front door of our house, the sunlight hit me right in the eyes and caught in the glare as I squinted, I managed to figure out the shape of my car where sat two figures at the front. As we moved closer to the car, I realized that the two figures were no one else but my elder brother and father. My brother seemed to be in an awkward costume, dressed in a white shirt and shorts, with a tiny green belt around his waist, white colored socks,shoes that had been polished since last night and not to forget a bag hung around his shoulders with a water bottle around his neck. The look on his face seemed to be of total glee and eagerness as as he kicked the air happily. My father, still in his kurta and pyjama had a proud smile on his face. It was one of those 'firsts' in his child's life.
His first day at school
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Far away in the realms of Middle Earth.
Rested a small region called Hobbiton.
And in a small corner lay a little town.
Known as the Shire, by all and one.
Where chimney smokes rose, white as snow
And trees danced in the music of the winds.
Here lived in a shack young Bilbo Baggins.
With tales up his sleeve that none would know.
One midsummer’s night as he sat in the fire,
Smoking his pipe and making round rings.
Staring with intent at his lone window pane
As he watched them trickling, the drops of rain.
As the fire crackled on through that hour.
The clouds thundered on as though turned sour.
The clock at his bedside ticked with each second.
But then from nowhere came a sound unheard.
It was a croak or a crack, he knew not which.
There was one and another and one more !
Whether it was a beast or just a little insect.
He had to find out, for it was now his itch.
The clouds had ended their tumultuous spell
But the mysterious noises refused to cease.
As the door opened, out came a figure all in black
It was young Bilbo Baggins, exiting his shack.
A lantern in his hand, he traversed through the mud.
In search for his beast that he sought to slay.
In the light of the moon, shadows danced on his face.
As the moths wavered about in their time of play.
His ears at his legs, he wandered on ahead.
The noise grew louder and more in number !
Was he alive and awake or deep in slumber ?
Nevertheless, he proceeded to meet his fate.
Soon he found himself reaching a small bog.
Enveloped in the sounds of different sorts.
There were chirps and croaks and hoots too.
He knew not where to look and what to do.
So he closed his eyes and raised his arms up high.
And in a heartbeat, the cacophony came to a halt.
Struck with the silence, he couldn’t believe his ears
With his head tilted to the stars, he opened his eyes.
And then he slowly looked down at the bog as it was.
But now he felt alone and afraid in the dark night.
Had he been abandoned due to fear or due to anger ?
Maybe his presence was an unwanted sight.
He lowered his arm to take leave when came a sound.
A chirp could be heard and then came two, no three!
Witnessing this ensemble, he smiled and waved his arm
The chirps waved too, rising and falling and moving around.
Then he waved his other arm and followed suit the croaks.
Waving his arms about along with the sounds of the night
He loved each moment of this strange and lovely escapade.
He was now a conductor and this was the choir he had made.
Climbing atop a rock, he looked down and heard them sing.
Which was once a racket had now turned into music!
As he stood there waving his arms in the moonlight.
The moths joined too, hovering above his head in a ring
Young Bilbo was there all night with his new found friends.
He even chose to sing a lore or two that he found to love.
And then danced a little too among the croaks and chirps.
Under the stars of the night he wished would never end.
Monday, June 23, 2008
I was woken with a jerk as the bus pulled over at the bus station. I hadn't realised when I had fallen asleep but I sure wasn't happy to be woken up. It's hard to sleep in a rickety old bus that has to travel for 6 hours and stop at every point to pick up people. I didn't mind the bus company making its living but flooding every inch of the bus with human kind wasn't my idea of making profit. Anyway, my legs were all cramped up and I had to move out of this temporary prison of mine. Descending down the steps, the cold caught hold of me and went straight to my nose resulting in a loud sneeze. Achoooooo !!! I sneezed, cursing the cold. Wiping off what was left of my sneeze by my sleeve, I proceeded on to the bus station (or what was left of it) in search for food,warmth and a place to pick up that much awaited long distance call of nature. With a stretch of the neck to the left and a quick glance to the right, I found myself right where I was with nothing. The cold was getting to my throat and more importantly, on my nerves. Comfort was what I was looking for in the middle of nowhere and I was just getting poked by the spring of the sofa.
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught the glance of something rising up to the air and vanishing into the dark sky. The view drew me closer and closer like a moth to light and when I was finally there, I saw this man wrapped up in everything he owned, peering out to the crowd with the only opening in his ' attire '. His eyes seemed to be old even though he seemed to be much younger. And there he was, serving tomato soup for a meagre 10 Rs. Tempted by the thought to help him and the more tempting thought of savouring soup. As I took the glass from his woolen glove, I let out a slight 'Thanks' and left him with a brand new 10 ruppee note, just to give that extra happiness that may give him warmth on this cold night.
As I blew on the soup as lightly as possible making sure sure not to spill any, I tilted my head upwards and stared into the night sky. Many a times I would do this without any reason or purpose, always search throught the deep dark voids for something. Not a UFO or an undiscovered planet, but just for soemthing, maybe I searched for myself. I could see only a handful of stars and always wished to have a telescope to uncover this blanket of darkness and reveal the cosmos to my eyes.
At that moment I realised that I had something with me, my new pair of specs that my mom had insistently made for me. I hated them the moment I put them on and swore never to wear them while I can see the number of fingers on my hand. I took them out of the case anyway and put them on. There werent any giggly girls or nosy bullies to mock me, it was just me and the night, embarrasment was a milestone far far away that said " Far far away 0 km"
As I took a sip from the hot soup and looked up into the night sky, an emotion came to life in me that started from the tip of my fingers to the tip of my nose. It was mixed with the tangy taste of the soup and the sight of watching thousands of stars so clear and alive for the first time in my life. It was like little white dots had sprung up out of nowhere and even though they were millions of light years away from me, I felt like i could pluck from the sky and place them on my cheek as glitter. I gazed and gazed and gazed a little more, it was a wonderful sight to see and wondered if anyone else ever tried this while at this bus station. It was an amazing feeling to be out there in the cold and yet be radiating with warmth that came not only from the soup, but from every cell in my body.
I stood there till the bus sounded its horn for us to depart and get on with the journey that lay ahead. As the wheels of the bus went round and round, I closed my eyes (still laden with my specs) with the image of the stars pasted in my mind and the taste of the soup hovering over my semi-burnt tongue.I enjoyed the rest of the bus ride happily ever after.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
How have you been ? Hope you are in the best of health and are taking care of your mother. Do fill me on the details of her condition. I am very proud in the effort that you have been making in taking care of your mother despite how grave her situation is. Just have faith and pray to the almighty that she starts to feel better soon.
As for me, I have been reassigned to a post known as Ghungar Pass, it is a post that has undergone a lot of heavy firing from the enemy territory. It is much colder than my previous posting and life is a lot more tedious. The nights are the worst when all you have with you are your clothings and a thin sheet that hardly proves to provide any comfort. I wish no person has to ever endure this torture. The facilities are really poor and for food, all we are given is a mixture of rotten milk and stale wheat. Sorry, I didn't ask about the food at your end. I hope you are able to purchase enough with the money I send you. I don't know why I am writing such a letter to you son but I have no one else here to talk to except the snow and the dead trees. I suppose fathers are supposed to be an inspiration and a role model to their children but today as I write this letter, I myself seem to feel out of place and am looking for reasons to feel proud and love my life.
I hope you are able to cover your studies well and are attending school regularly. Education is a very important part in one's life and I regret not giving it that much attention in my own. I want you to be the man I could never be son. As for this war that I have been entangled in, I have no idea how long it will last. Last night, I heard from the senior corporal that it might take months. I feel like I'm living an endless night where there is no peace, no sleep, no sweet dreams, no moon and no stars... just absolute darkness and I feel the shadows creeping in closer with each passing day.
I do not know when I shall be able to send you another letter but always remember son, never lose hope in yourself, one can always make something of himself in no matter what state he/she has been put in. Just remember to keep that hope alive in yourself. Live your life to the fullest son. I fear that I may never be able to share your first beer with you or give you the keys of your first bike. But promise me that you will never forget who you are and remember that I will always love you and be there for you. Maybe in your prayers or in your dreams, I shall be watching over you. Whether I return at our house's doorstep engulfed in happiness or wrapped in a flag, embrace me like you never have and welcome your father back.
Take care son
Your Loving Father
Friday, June 6, 2008
Sunday, April 13, 2008
I wander to places where the stray dog barks
Wrapped in a shawl with a stick in my hand
I dwell in the shadows of this strange land
Rubbing my hands through the cold nights
I leave my mark under the street lights
The silence slowly creeps up my back
Dreading the thoughts of a blow or attack
But this is my job and my daily bread.
Even if one day I might end up dead.
Sometimes I try to befriend the stars
Or admire the color of the shiny cars.
Anything and everything to kill some time.
As I save the day/night by fighting crime.
Maybe one fine day, I'll face that crook.
And hope he doesn't see the fear in my look.
I hope he runs at the sight of my face.
And never hopes to return to this place.
I'm happy in the alleys and the silent parks
Wandering to places where the stray dog barks.
Friday, March 14, 2008
relationships are like a cloud
at first, it gives you shade and you enjoy it with bliss
and as the cloud grows bigger
you tend to like it even more and more and more
but then comes a stage when the cloud darkens, and it grows bigger
youre still ok with it till....
it pours and pours and pours cats and dogs a lil more
and all u can do is stand in the rain and wait for it stop
in very rare cases does it actually stop
and while we wait for it to stop, we don’t realize how wet we get in this tumultuous rain of sorrow
and then as the cloud begins to move away
there are two choices left with the person
either follow that cloud and the pour, wanting and waiting for it to become white yet again
stay where u are and let the sun shine its way through and dry u up
the drying process will take time
and the more you stand in one place and not look at the cloud
in the end, youll realise how much you missed the sun shining on your face and giving you the warmth that was absent in the shade of the cloud
and enjoy every moment of it
its a very hard move to detach urself from the cloud
but it always is the better option
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Brushing his hands in his hair.
The thoughts in his mind were rushing fast
Trying to look at the times in the past.
He tried to remember something that was real
Something, that could help him heal
For he was in the midst of a war
A war, that everyone were waiting for.
The sound of bullets, he could hear them well.
The air so harmful, yet he had to smell.
He heard the soldiers shouting aloud.
Giving up their lives to make their land proud.
The enemy he knew, was drawing near.
His hands and legs were shaking with fear.
He mustered up his courage, he took his gun.
He laughed aloud, he was ready to have fun.
He finally came out, through the barbed wire.
His eyes were burning red, as if on fire.
There he was in the war’s battlefield.
He was all alone, he had no shield.
Suddenly, he heard a noise nearby.
He knew what it was, up in the sky.
The armored birds had begun to shoot,
He ran hard, with the strength in his boot.
But it was too late, he had been hit.
He lost his balance and fell into a pit.
His shoulder was wounded very bad.
He was screaming aloud, as if he were mad.
The pain was unbearable he did not succumb.
He looked at his shoulder, which now as numb.
He slowly clambered out of the hole.
It was enough, he had to reach his goal.
Luckily he found an enemy base.
He ran towards it, with all his pace.
He ended up shooting some of the men.
But he was outnumbered, one to ten.
He took out a grenade, pulled the pin.
The soldiers ran hard, to save their skin.
The soldier laughed, the bomb blew.
Out of the base, bodies flew.
The war had ended, over now.
But why did it happen ? and how ?
The soldier had died in madness.
His death was news to bring sadness.
This is what happens in every nation
War is bad, a bad creation.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
DAY2: Making myself aware of my surroundings, I realised that I had somehow managed to land myself on an island that had not yet fallen under the eyes of the common man hellbent on searching, discovering and then destroying everything and anything. I was the first man to set foot on this land.
DAY3:My hunger started to get the better of me and my search for food became desperate. Watching all those shows and movies on TV, i tried to gather whatever i could swallow and digest but it was harder than i thought it to be. The trees were way too high for me to reach for fruits and I had chosen to let go of the fishes. Yes, I was a vegetarian and Yes, I was too slow to get even near them.
DAY4: Still having found nothing to eat and only salt water to drink, I decided to get my mind off food and try exploring this island. This was an island much smaller than I imagined, it was only the size of 2 football fields altogether. As I stared into the endless horizon, using all of my power to make a ship magically appear out of nowhere, I wondered if I would ever be rescued, I wonder how long it would take for my movie to end, with a glorious escape back to civilization. It all seemed too unreal.
DAY5: The day was a hot one, the sun was beating down hard on me and I chose to spend the entire day under the shade of a tree and laze around. It felt good to be away from the city life and the pressures and strains that man had put on my back. I was a beast but not of burden.
DAY6:Clouds began to gather, it was a glorious respite from the torrential heat of the sun, I had managed to pick up a couple of berries from the nearby shrub and swallow them. Fortunately, they weren't poisonous and I was able to live on them for the rest of my days here.
DAY7:It started to rain, it started off with a light drizzle that quickly developed into a tumultuous outburst. The seas grew violent and waves were getting bigger by the minute. The wind too picked up and before i knew it, I was in the midst of the biggest storm that had been witnessed in a century. I ran with all the might to seek cover but there was water, water everywhere. I thought this was the end of the world and mine too. I latched onto a tree to avoid myself from getting washed away but the current was too strong. Before i knew it, the waves had carried the tree and I too with it. The water was over me and below me, it was in my ears, my nose my hair my mouth. I and the water had become one. I gasped for air and moved my hands and feet just to stay afloat. I finally chose to give up and let the sea swallow me up.
I knew that nobody in the world knew where I was and what was happening to me. They had probably forgotten me by now and were back to their own work and their own lives. My end would be an unfortunate one but I was pitying those who died everyday in their cubicles,dancing to their master's tunes. Who cried over their miseries everyday and committed a thousand sins to make up for one good deed. They were rats in a gutter who scavenged on anything and followed the piper to die in the sea, they were not humans anymore. Sure, I could have chosen to give up my life like every other news headline, but I would never have been able to do it. God brought me to this world a free man and now He was taking me away as a free man. I threw up my arms with a smile and all the glee in my heart,thanked Him and went down below into the depths of the sea.
The next thing I remember is seeing a bright white light and the heavy voice of a man calling my name. It was then I realised that I was in Heaven and God was calling my name out loud. I replied " I am here father" and smiled heartily. Soon a face emerged in front of me and said, " Congratulations" and I was too happy to say anything so I just smiled. The next thing that followed were the words, " You've been saved."
Suddenly, the light faded and there I was lying in a hospital bed with only my God, who turned out to be my doctor, standing beside me and looking at me as if he was about to kiss me. It was then that something inside of me fell from a 100 feet and broke into small and tiny bits of pieces.