Thursday, July 1, 2010
About the last night
Nostalgia creeps over me in spasms and leaves in a disarray of emotions as I witness the final hours of the darkness before the blinding light. Its a calm emotion that sweeps over my thoughts and one day all of these sights and sounds will be sweeped away for new ones. These 4 years, being confined to the dimension of 3m x 4.5m of space seemed to fly by and now as the last moments tick away, I can just feel gratitude for the time that I have wasted so happily in this place.
Wasted lives, wasted opportunities
With friends, with souls with unknown foes.
With sinking feelings and twinkling toes.
I hope the next occupant of this lair gives it as much as love as I have. It is a sad break up. Im glad that my room has no emotions, else I would have have leaks in every corner. My bags are still unpacked for I dont wish to leave this room, its a part of me as much I have been a part of it. When I am gone, the dust that remains will remember me too and so will the grills on the open window. The gloom of the red light will shine on till it is hurled into an oblivion. The crackling switchboard and the shrieking fan can bear witness to empty stands of the rack on my wall.
My adorned bottles of victory and bliss will guard this haven before they fall but till then their hollow shells can swell in peace. The echoes of the songs that shall never be played still linger in the holes where creatures reside and anthems to odes can keep their place before a tune can shame their face. And the view of the hills will be remembered as they took me to the forests and the stench of petrol in the scent of pine. Keeping these memories will keep me alive but one day they will vanish. And so it is useless to live on dialysis and pray for a miracle to save from the pills.
It is for this reason, I proclaim that this is the day I died.
Where it said on my grave:
"Let this be a reminder that there were times when humanity gave way to insanity."